I built my wall with trembling hands
hoping they'd notice, a shift in sands.
Brushed off by silence, dark and unseen
In shadows, my efforts lingered as if never been.
Love withheld became my chain,
Binding me tightly in growing pain.
Each plea met with air felt unaware
Put a dagger in me like their love a snare.
Now I fade in my bane
like an ache made me insane.
19/11/2024
Inferior in your eyes, I fall apart
Inadequate love, though I gave my heart
Insufficient strength to carry your weight
Imperfect hands that can't change fate
Unworthy of the dreams we once shared
Unfulfilled a soul left unprepared
Unmet desires linger in the night
unaccomplished, lost in endless fight
-10/11/24-
Affection you gave boundless and bright
A constant warmth in shadowed light
You adore with a heart so patient and true
An amour so deep, made me so rue
I admire your grace, gentle and kind
and appreciate love I could never return in kind...
~10/11/24
I hide my pain to halt the fates cruel games
Concealed anguish flickers, get stays untamed
Hidden sorrows wraps fight around my soul
For every moment without you takes its toll
Silenced torment whispers soft in the night
Masked heartache blooms, but stays out of sight
I bury grief deep, where no one can see
Knowing you live free of memories of me
A quiet despair unseen and chained
To spare you the weight of my endless pain
In shadows I linger alone yet set free
Letting you live as I fade quietly...
07/11/24
From past to future, I shift my view
Holding still, as paths renew
Destiny calls, but I turn away
To forge a fate where sorrows won't stay
Refracting from the past to future
Refraining from doing anything
Refusing the call of destiny
Feforming the fate of Misery
Chasing whispers to find who I was, asking "Why?"
Memories are fading and losing the color of the present
sifting through the fragment not counting the portend
acted fearless with dreams that would soar
in the shadows I shiver, unsure to leap over the horror
The face so familiar still feels like pain
time rushed forward here I remain
echos of that voice haunt me in dreams
the joy of living ended where the sleep reams.
started a new chapter, and still smells like that night
Silenced my roar, Shacklied my hand
in stillness, I tread to untie my hand from the rail
Here the pieces of horror I wanna forget but
poss to toss my childhood
Reclaiming the fragment that make up my soul
to bind it together
to find the answer to my question "why?"
